The Golden Girls plus one

I was waiting to pick up my order of sandwiches this weekend at a Mr. Baguette near my house when four old women, all with short permed hair and wearing long floral gowns walked in. They stood out because they were all Caucasian in a predominantly Asian store. They all walked in not knowing where the line to order was since there was no real line that was formed. One of them almost tripped over the pole that was placed to indicate where the line began, so she quickly turned around to notify her companions that the pole was there and that they should be careful not trip over it. It was cute. It was one of those moments that made me smile. It was like the Golden Girls plus one, but in a weird way, they kind of made me think of Sex and the City and how those women could have been the "old" version of Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda. That made me smile even more. I just hoped that one day, when my friends and I are all old, that we would go out to random places like that and enjoy life like we would have if we were young.

parents

I recently found out that a couple of my co-workers, both around my age, had lost a parent - one lost his mom when he was 12 and the other lost her dad when she was 14. I found out in awkward moments where I had wished I hadn't asked the questions I had asked, but any normal person would have probably asked the same questions.

After Mother's Day had passed, I asked him "So what'd you do for Mother's Day?" He replied, "My mom passed away when I was 12 so we all decided to go hunting to try and forget about it."

On another day, I had asked "So what are you doing this weekend?" She replied, "I'm going to visit my dad on Sunday." So I asked "Where at?" And she said "At the cemetery. My dad passed away when I was 14. All the smoking and drinking that he did way back when finally caught up with him."

I didn't know how to respond to these answers they gave. All I could do was say "I'm sorry." But it made me think a lot afterwards about how lucky I am to still have both of my parents, alive and well, still happy and content. It's so hard to imagine life without them being here doing the funny quirky things they do that make me laugh, like how my mom bought shoes the other day for when she goes on vacation to Burma, but we don't really know when we're going, or like how my dad got this really ugly chair cover for his car seat because it was free and decided that he had to use it because he had it. Things like that make my parents my parents, and I love them for that. There's no one in the world who can replace them and I've learned to appreciate the time I get to spend with them because unlike my co-workers, I have the opportunity to do so and I've learned that I have to take advantage of that.

the 7th wheel

I was talking with one of my friends today about our "field trip" this weekend to the IMAX theater and science museum. Our friend decided to do a "remember when we were in elementary school..." day, hence the IMAX and the museum but sans the sack lunches.

Turns out everyone who's going has a "partner" or significant other whom they plan on bringing along on the trip. Let's see...three couples and single ole me...hmmm...that sounds fun! They assure me that it'll be fine, that it won't be weird or awkward cuz I've hung out with them before, which is true, but not with all three couples at the same time. There were always other single people there, so it was fine. They think I'm silly for not wanting to go because of this, but think about it - wouldn't you feel a little awkward? Like you're the 5th wheel, but in this case, a 7th? Don't get me wrong - I like all of them, but being around a lot of couples at the same time is just not my thing. The thing is, I don't want them to feel weird around me because they know I feel this way. So it's kind of weird...

But sometimes I feel like they don't understand. They've all been in really long relationships. I would say they're the kind of relationships where you know there's marriage in the future for them all. I on the other hand, have never been a long term relationship or even a short one for that matter. Don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem being single; I kind of enjoy it - being able to do things on my own whenever I want with whomever I want, getting alone time when I need it, and being able to check out hot guys whenever they're around without feeling guilty. But sometimes I just wish I had that special someone as well. And there's always those moments where you wish someone were there. So it's kind of hard for me sometimes to be around all these happy couples (and yes, if I sound bitter, maybe I am a little and I admit it). Sometimes being around a lot of people (especially when they're all couples) can make you feel lonlier than just being around a few people. I know that sounds strange, but I guess you had to have had that feeling before to know exactly what I mean.

hmmmmm...

I recently found out that an ex-co-worker of mine has a case at an immigration law firm my friend works at - weird how small this world is. He's getting married to a young Asian girl, one year younger than me, but mind you, he's probably about twice her age. They're applying to get her a green card - hmmmm.

He was one of those guys at work that all the women loved to hide from. He was not bad looking, but he was arrogant and self absorbed and very closed-minded. He'd frequently invite himself to lunch with random people and when that wouldn't work, he'd ask people out to lunch instead. He had a track record of asking all (well most of) the Asian women at our work out to lunch while they would try and make excuses not to go with him.

There was this one incident where my friends (a girl and a guy) and I were in the car, ready to leave for lunch. (Earlier that day, he had asked my friend (the girl) out to lunch, but she said she had brought her food and she'd be eating with us, which was true at the time, but we all changed our minds and decided to go out instead). Next thing you know, while backing out, he appears next to the car, opens the door, and hops in, inviting himself to come with us (damn, how I wish we just drove off or at least locked the door). At this point, how could we refuse? He was already sitting in the car! Anyway, one of the conversations we had went something like this:

Ex-co-worker (directing question to my Asian girl friend): So have you had any other jobs before this one?

Girl Friend: Yea, why?

Ex-co-worker: Because I know that a lot of Asian people don't really work until they graduate from school.

Girl Friend: What? I've had a lot of jobs before this one while I was in school (and she went ahead and pretty much listed her resume to try and disprove his theory).

At this point, I was sitting there thinking "Great, we have to have another one of these conversations with him." The next thing you know, while I was sitting there trying to eat my food, he leans over and wipes my mouth with a napkin. According to my friends, I had a look of horror on my face, trying to back away from him, wondering what the hell he was doing wiping my mouth - can i just say eeeewww! Who does that?

Example #2 of what conversations are like with him:

Ex-co-worker: So what school did you graduate from?

Another Girl Friend: ASU, why?

Ex-co-worker: Just wondering. What was your major because isn't that school really easy?

Girl Friend: I had two majors, *blank* and *blank* (I don't really remember what she said they were).

Ex-co-worker: Oh really? Well those are really easy majors and your GPA was probably not that high huh?

Girl Friend: No, I actually had a 3.9 and graduated with honors.

Ex-co-worker: Oh, well I graduated from...(I don't remember what school he said, but he went on and on about how smart he was and how much better his school was).

Yeeea, so see what a catch he is? So I wasn't surprised when I heard he was marrying that girl. The sad part is that I can't believe he found someone before I did!

dude, where's my car?

So we went to the Coachella Music and Arts Festival on Saturday and we all agreed that it was a really nice day in Coachella compared to the past ones we've attended. It was sunny, warm (hot at times), and there was a cool breeze that constantly blew throughout the day.

We started the day off with The Sexy Magazines (who screamed a lot), stopped by Katie Melua (who was very cute and British), saw k-os (very entertaining), waited for Snow Patrol (who was not very good live), saw Keane (who sounded exactly like they do on the cd), stopped by Rilo Kiley and Wilco, saw Weezer (who could have been a bit more entertaining), and last but not least, we saw Coldplay - the definite highlight of my evening (he was so hot, and I think it's partly because of his cute accent, and he played snip-its of Weezer and NIN which was cute). The crowd was singing along in unison and there was this one song where he told the crowd to take a picture at the same time - it was like a sea of flashing stars - very cool!

The day was filled with strange people - one playing air guitar and doing the Macarena (not sure if that's how you spell that) tp Coldplay (yea, I don't get it either) and another sitting on top of a guy's shoulders while letting another rub her ass (really strange but hilarious in a weird way - I guess you had to be there).

So the night was ending and my friend says that something is bound to go wrong because we (meaning her and her friend Betty) have never had a perfect day like this - something bad will happen. Yea, she totally jinxed us - we were headed out to the parking lot, following the crowd and not paying attention to where we were going. Next thing you know, 40 minutes pass and we had to backtrack to where we were to figure out where the heck our car was. We decided to ask a parking attendant and were curious as to how many parking lots there were - he replied "17." Our mouths dropped, all of us picturing us having to go to every single one of those parking lots to look for the car. I felt like we were in the parking lot of Disneyland except with no cute cartoon characters to guide our way, just big yellow balloons with numbers flying in the sky. An hour and some minutes later, we found it - all of us tired but glad that none of us yelled at each other because apparently, some of their other friends would have. I finally got home around 3:30 in the morning and fell asleep with dreams of Chris Martin in my head...=)

a really close call

We went to a co-worker's birthday bash at an 18 and over club in Irvine (she was turning 26, and none of her friends were under age, but this was one of the only places in the city that she could find with a guest list option). I haven't been to an 18 and over place in a long time. We went in feeling old, especially with all these girls in the bathroom with "X's" marked on each hand, a symbol for the bartenders to know who was under age. We met my co-workers friends, and my roommates and I drank and danced all night like we haven't drank and danced in long time. It was fun - my roommates and I left around 1:30 in the morning, telling each other how many drinks we thought we've had and who we talked to and danced with that night.

We woke up the next morning a little tired but decided to go to a Habit for Humanity workshop we had planned on going to anyway. On our way back, I got a call from my co-worker. She was at the hospital and said that there was a shooting at the club last night. I was in shock. She was sitting at the hospital covered in blood. Her boyfriend got shot - everyone said he was really lucky. The bullet went in his head (he has four inches of stitches) and made a u-turn, coming back out through the top of his ear. I'd say pretty lucky alright...someone was definitely watching over him that night. From what I heard, he's going to be alright, thank God. The security guard at the club though, wasn't so lucky. He was shot in the chest and had died that morning. I never thought something like this would happen to anyone I would know, especially in the city of Irvine, one of the safest cities in the United States. And you would think they would have already caught the people who did this, but they haven't yet even though there were quite a few witnesses.

My friends all said we were really lucky we left a little early that night. I'd have to say the same. Apparently this had all happened about 10-15 minutes after we had left...someone was definitely watching over us that night as well.

if they can do it, we can do it, or it can't be done at all

We stopped by Chicago on our way home from New York to visit my sister at Kellogg, where she's currently going to business school. My friend and I met a lot of her friends and classmates who were all really friendly and outgoing, way too much for the two of us who are usually pretty tame people. A simple "hi" and wave to them is an excited "hi, hug, and 'oh my gosh! you're here!,'" as if they all already knew me and were all expecting to see me.

We tagged along to a few of my sister's events and felt like two high school girls sitting in the corner while all the college students socialize and talk about their classes and professors, when in actuality, we've already graduated from college and so have they. We were kind of quiet and had few words - we felt like we had nothing in common with any of them. My sister said "It's what you make of it," but that's easy to say when you've been a social, smart, outgoing person for your entire life and can easily associate with people in any situation. I'm not saying that my friend and I are not social, smart, or outgoing - we're just the kind of people who you just have to get to know first to see that we are. We can't just be like that with random people we've never met - it's harder than it seems, especially when just talking with a few people there made us feel so unaccomplished, like we lacked something and haven't yet experienced life the way we were supposed to. Everyone there had great jobs before they decided to go to business school and have travelled to places I could only wish I've gone to. We couldn't really relate since we both don't really love our jobs and haven't really gotten the chance to travel to places around the world.

But truthfully, that whole experience enlightened us. It made us contemplate about how we can change our lives - how we can do things that they have done. I had a lot of time to think on my plane ride home and I've come up with some goals:

1.) Take a class to put together the portfolio I've been wanting to put together for years, even though it'll cost me an arm and a leg.

2.) Volunteer for something on the weekends to help out with an important cause and at the same time meet new people.

3.) Learn how to start my own business (this is a really long term goal), but I can't really disclose what I'm planning to do since I don't want to give any of my ideas away.

4.) Travel whenever the opportunity presents itself.

I feel like now that I've actually written it out, I have to follow through with all of them because if I didn't, I'd feel like one of those high school girls sitting in the corner again, like I haven't experienced life the way I wanted to...and I hate that feeling.

an L.A. moment in NYC

So I was gone for about a week on vacation in New York with a friend of mine from work. Boy do I miss not having summer vacation!

Anyway, New York was fun - highlight of my trip was seeing Mariah Carey, Alec Baldwin, Jessica Lange, and Christian Slater all in one day (although sitting in front of Carrie's stoop from Sex and the City was pretty cool too). I didn't think I'd be as star struck as I actually was since I'm from L.A. and all, but I was!

Mariah was performing in Times Square that morning - that was kind of cool. And we went to see the Glass Menagerie that night (very good seats by the way - 11th row center, thanks to the tkts booth down in lower Manhattan), starring Jessica Lange and Christian Slater (he was one of the reasons why we went to go see it. He was actually shorter than we pictured him to be). During intermission we noticed Alec Baldwin sitting in the row in front of us (we actually had better seats than he did though cuz his seats were on the far right end of the row - hehe). He looked kind of old an frumpy with huge glasses, but he was with a young Asian woman, probably about half his age - she was pretty. My friend jokingly asked "How do we become one of those Asian girls?" No, really how do we? haha. As the play ended, Jessica Lange went up on stage asking for donations to support something about theater. We weren't really paying attention since were staring at Alec Baldwin to see where he was going. Lone and behold, as we were leaving, he and his woman were standing right behind me (his arm touched my back). I turned around and just smiled and so did my friend. No words, just a smile, and we proceeded to walk out. As we were walking out, Christian Slater was standing at the door, about six inches away from us, collecting donations in a bucket. He smiled at us and we both smiled back. And we just walked out - speechless. We looked like two cheap Asian asses cuz we had no money to donate and we didn't even have the guts to say anything to him. But as we left, we saw to girls running in from outside of the theater screaming with a camera to take a picture with him. We left thinking "Thank God we didn't do that." We didn't want to be those pesky girls bugging them for authographs and pictures because they probably have to deal with that all the time. We wanted to look calm and collected, like it was no big deal when it kind of was to us. So we left excited, telling each other what we should have said to Alec Baldwin and Christian Slater, well, mostly Christian Slater - how he was great in the play, but how we was even better in Untamed Heart...LOL. We told each other about how we thought he was totally looking at us in the audience during the play (he probably really wasn't looking at either of us at all). It felt like an L.A. moment, but it was one of those moments that I'm glad I got to share with someone else, especially with one of my friends who was just as excited as I was.

guiness here we come!

So moving to a new place and not having access to the internet sucks, but going to a pretty much free Guiness event with free food and beer for only the price of a $5 donation for the Lance Armstrong Foundation - Priceless!

geeze?

so apparently,

"geeze" (not sure of the spelling) = pissed = getting drunk

that's the first i heard of the word "geeze" until this weekend, and apparently, it's the first for seven other people as well...

click...

My dad called me today. I had missed his call so I called him back. I hear someone pick up but there was just background noise, kind of like when someone accidentally calls your phone. I say "hello" three times and no one answers and I finally hear a click. He hung up on me. I then receive a voice message with the same background noise - not really a voice message I guess. I call him once again and he says he was trying to leave me a message. LOL.

This how the conversation went:

Dad: Hey, I know you're not coming home this weekend, so when you come home next weekend...

Me: (Interrupting him) I don't think I'm coming home that weekend either because I'm moving that weekend.

Dad: What?! You're not coming home that weekend either?! I need you to bring your computer home so I can borrow it and see if the TurboTax will work on your computer!

(Side Note: We've been having these problems getting all the updates for the TurboTax he bought - I have to say I hate TurboTax now with a passion!)

Me: Why? We have the same computer. Why would you think it would work on mine?

Dad: Your uncles said to try it! Fine, you don't want me to borrow your computer?!!! (he says this in a yelling tone) Fine!!! (yelling again)

And then I hear a click. He hung up on me AGAIN. WHAT THE??? And this time, it wasn't the kind of LOL kind of hanging up on me. It was the "what the ****!?" kind of hang up. I really don't understand parents, or maybe it's just mine...

"filing party"

We had a "filing party" at work today...

You know it's time to look for another job when you start having "filing parties" at work. I guess you could consider it a small party since our boss DID buy us some snacks to munch on - some cookies and a fruit platter. Who does this?

There comes a point where you have the urge to pick up and leave because there is this point where you've just had it. I've hit that point a long time ago and it just came and gone. I've lost that drive - the drive to look for something else, the drive to find something I REALLY want to do. I never pictured myself in the mortgage industry but that's where I ended up. It was one of those jobs that was the only option after college since there was nothing else available. And it's been about two years. I can't say that I hate my job because I don't. We're always busy and the day flies. The perks are great - leaving early at the end of each month, free Laker tickets, free In N' Out. But still, I feel like there's something missing. I feel like I settled somehow and maybe I did because it was the practical thing to do. I always question myself on whether or not I can do more - with finding a job a I'd like, with feeling a sense of self fulfillment, with expanding my social circles. I know the answer to all my questions is a "yes," but where do people get that drive to actually do it?

coordination - is it in our future?

My friend and I decided awhile ago that we're both not equipped to do anything that requires hand-eye or any sort of physical coordination. We've gone snowboarding a few times and have decided that carving is nowhere close in our near future. We've played tennis a few times and decided that that just wasn't the sport for us. We've played pool a few times and got tired from standing since it took THAT long for us to finish one game. Are we the only people out there who suffer from this impediment?

I can't say that we are completely uncoordinated though - we're pretty good at crafts, which does involve some sort of coordination! =) I don't think we're that bad as drivers and we can dance pretty decently, well, I know she can anyway...

it's raining...

like CRAZY, but it's actually kinda fun...sometimes...never thought there'd be tornados in Cali...

i just know

My mom asked me out of the blue whether or not I had a picture of my grandmother up in my room at my apartment. I said "yes," and asked her why. She said with a smile, "Because grandmother is very strong right now." I said "How do you know?" She replied with an even a bigger smile and said "I just know. Whenever you need help with anything you can look at that picture and ask her to help you." I smiled at her and she gave a little laugh.

I love how my mom does that. She "just knows" a lot of things. Like how she "just knows" that that gross "chicken of essence" stuff she makes you drink will make your resistance better, but when you ask her how, she doesn't really know. But with that most recent "I just know" comment, I can tell she misses her mom, and that made me miss my grandmother a little. It is the new year, and doing all these chinese new year family activities makes it a bit nostalgic.

who knew?

Who knew going to a party a co-worker invited you to wouldn't be as fun as you thought? Who knew you would see all these old co-workers (and by old I mean in age) there hitting on these younger (and when I say younger, I mean way younger) women, one of them being your roommate? Ewwww....

pew hue fu

“Pew hue fu,” for those who understand Toi San, it literally means, “tear a pair of pants” but for one of my aunts, it means “beautiful” in English. That one word, “beautiful,” sparked a conversation the other day with a bunch of my cousins and I while eating dinner at a Black Angus restaurant. One of my younger cousins in high school (let’s call her Alicia) was telling us about this boy whom she previously asked to her winter ball and who now has a crush on her. This is how the conversation went:

Alicia: “I know he has a crush on me, but I don’t know if I like him because all the other girls at school like him. And he’s kind of a nerd – he uses the word ‘farewell’ and who says that? He dropped me off after the dance in his Lexus and said “farewell,” and I said ‘ewww.’”

Cousins: “What? Why would you say that?”

Alicia: “Because it’s weird. He uses the word ‘apparently’ too. Who uses words like that?”

Cousins: “We do! What’s wrong with using the word ‘apparently?’”

Alicia: “I don’t know. It’s weird for people in high school. We were talking about our schedules and he said ‘Apparently, they didn’t have anymore space in that class, so I had to sign up for another one.’ Who says that? And when we were at the dance, all the other girls’ dates were complimenting them, saying ‘You look nice’ or ‘You look good’ or ‘You look pretty’ or ‘You look sexy,’ but you know what he told me? He said ‘You look beautiful.’ Who says that?!”

Cousins: “Uh, that one was the best one out of all of them. Why wouldn’t you want someone telling you that you’re beautiful? You’re supposed to say ‘Thank you.’”

Alicia: “I said ‘No, no, no.’”

Cousins: “What?! Why?!”

Alicia: “Because, he’s just kinda nerdy and he can’t dance. And no one talks like that.”

Cousins: “Just because he uses words with more than one or two syllables, it doesn’t mean it’s bad. Would you rather have someone who’s dumb and can dance and looks like an idiot than someone who’s smart that can probably learn how to dance?”

Alicia: “No, I just can’t go out with someone who can’t dance. It’s a turn off. And the other day, I said that I needed help with my Calculus homework so he helped me.”

Cousins: “Soooo…isn’t that GOOD?”

Alicia: “No. I’m like the damsel in distress and he’s like the knight in shining armor that saves me with his intelligence and not his sword.”
Cousins: “Wouldn’t you rather have a smart guy than some dumb guy with a sword? What is he going to do with a sword? And what other kinds of ‘distress’ can you being having in school?”

Alicia: “I don’t know – more fun?!”

Cousins: “OMG! He’s smart, tall, good-looking, rich and popular. Why wouldn’t you like him?”

Alicia: “I don’t know…he’s just different.”

Cousins: “You know what, maybe you should just not lead him on and let some other girl have him.”

Alicia: “No! If I don’t want him, I don’t want any other girl having him either! Hehe.”

What has the world come to?